Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Quiznos Lobster Seafood salad sub!

Whenever I hear of a chain restaurant adding Lobster to their menu it usually comes along with a scoff. "Pssh, Lobster. Yeah like that's going to taste anything like the real thing." Or "Psssh, Lobster. That's probably going to cost an arm and a leg." So when we got some emails from readers asking us to check out the new Quiznos Lobster seafood salad sub, we really weren't into it at first. One of our writers can't stand any seafood at all. Another only likes his lobster if a real man cracks it open and gives him the meat. So, that left me. Well I'm not one to turn down a challenge, so let's get to it!

Gotta have that Raspberry Lemonade!

I marched into my local Quiznos to get one of these bad boys and I was not expecting the best. You see, I spent a large portion of my youth in Maine, LOBSTER COUNTRY! THEY HAVE A LOBSTER ON THEIR DAMN LICENSE PLATE, SON! There are lobster men on one side of the family. As a coming of age, I once had to challenge my dad to a lobster eating contest. He won by a claw but I did so well I earned the right to be called a man. Also my friend Matt puts together an annual lobster feed where a bunch of us just get together and see how many lobsters we can eat before we are all so full we want to die. It's glorious.  So chain restaurant lobster had a long way to go to dazzle me. But I'm open minded and Quiznos usually does right by me. So I walked in, ordered the Lobster on the Jalapeno Cheddar Bread, and all I got for additions were lettuce and onion! Keeping it simple to let the lobster shine!

This guy didn't care about making it pretty. 

Before I took a bite I took a look under the hood to see what I was dealing with first hand. It didn't look as nice as the picture on the sign did, but come on,  they never do. EVER. The one in the picture looked kind of like perfect little balls of lobster meat. I actually thought this looked more like real lobster because I could see chunks of claws in addition to tail meat. But it was time to dig in, so with one more cross eyed glare of uncertainty, I bit into it...

Even when he's not REALLY here Irwin is still hovering for food. 

It took me two or three bites of this sandwich to actually realize that it wasn't bad. I was so prepared for it to be! In fact, it was decent. Actually...it was somehow pretty damn good. There were big chunks of lobster all through it and a minimal amount of mayo so the lobster really was the main flavor. They buttered the bun before they send it through the toaster and it ended up adding that familiar flavor of dunking the lobster in butter. I quickly finished the first half and sat back to mull it over while crunching down a few Doritos. 

Chock full of Lobster goodness! 
I think my choice of the jalapeno cheddar bread was a good one. It added a little zing to the flavor on the back end that I really enjoyed. But all in all, I was very surprised at how much I enjoyed the Quiznos Lobster seafood salad! They didn't skimp on the lobster at all and the combined flavors reminded me of some great Lobster rolls I had eaten in the past. Now, I'm not going to tell you it's as good as cracking that sea bug open and digging the meat out yourself. Nothing beats that. But my friends, if you're looking for a quick fix of lobster and don't have the time or money to bring some home and cook them up yourself, head on over to your local Quiznos and they will hook you up!

Which brings me to my next point. Would you like Quiznos to hook YOU up? Well we contacted them and they agreed to send one of our lucky readers a gift card in the mail so that they could go try the Lobster seafood salad for themselves! What do you have to do to win? Just comment on this review! One lucky commenter will be chosen at random and get to eat on Quiznos dime! FREE LOBSTER SUB?! YOU CAN'T BEAT THAT!

So get commenting, folks! You can't win if you don't comment!

As always, if there's an item you spied at your local grocery or convenience store that you want us to review, or you're wondering about that new Fast Food item that everyone has been talking about, please let us know! You can email us at fatguyfoodblog@gmail.com . Or you can hit us up on Twitter: @fatguyfoodblog , or even check our our Facebook page! www.facebook.com.fatguyfoodblog . WE ARE EVERYWHERE! We love to hear from you, our readers. Did you agree with our review? No? Do you think we are awesome? Do you think we suck? Let us know!

For more info on Quiznos Lobster items, hit up their website here: https://www.quiznos.com/Menu/deli-style-sub-sandwich/lobster-seafood-salad-sandwich.aspx

-Review by Rich

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

Red Velvet Oreo cookies!

For a while it seemed like we were being paid off by the people at Nabisco. Nearly every other review on our site was for a new flavor of Oreo. Now, some of our readers like to joke about it and call us FATGUYOREOBLOG. Which...to be honest, wouldn't be a bad idea for a blog. I would read it. You probably would too right? Well since 2015 kicked off it's like the good folks at Nabisco have been in hiding, just waiting to debut the first of what will probably be 76 new flavors of Oreo this year. Well, it looks like that time has gone. Ladies & Gents, we tracked down the Limited Edition Red Velvet Oreo cookies! 

Hmm...what's up with that cookie? Did the package print wrong? 

Now the first thing I'm going to tell you is that your eyes do not deceive you. This package is SMALL.  It looks to be maybe 2/3 the size of a usual pack. I was torn about this. The reasonable part of my brain said, "Hmm. That's a good idea, in case this limited edition Oreo isn't that good." But the other part, the fat guy in my brain says, "SERIOUSLY?! A MINI-PACKAGE?! What the hell is going on? What scam are you trying to pull on us, Oreo?!" But in the end I will just say that I hope this isn't something they plan on doing a lot in the future because Oreo has a great track record. For some reason it makes me think that they put them out in small packages because they didn't think people would be interested enough to buy a full package of them. I'm sure that's  not the case, but as a consumer it looks to me like they are counting these bad larrys out before I even take my first bite!


First thing you notice? YUP, those cookies are red. Already I have forgiven them for the small packages because I am so excited to see another color of Oreo cookie besides Golden and the Original black ones, which people call chocolate, but don't taste like any chocolate I've ever had in my life. Red Velvet Oreos NEEDED to be red. Bravo, Nabisco for going the extra mile!
But how did they taste? Quite good! While the red cookie pretty much tastes just like the original Oreos, the frosting is what really sets it apart. The package boasted cream cheese flavored creme, and that's definitely what you get! It's a strange hybrid of the usual Oreo creme infused with the taste of cream cheese and I would say they definitely nailed the taste.

Should you give these a try? Absolutely. If you're an Oreo fan and like to try all the crazy flavors they come up with, you should absolutely track these down. Don't let the little package discourage you, either. If you think you'll really like them, just scoop up two!

I'm going to give the Limited Edition Red Velvet Oreo cookies a solid B+. They nail the red velvet cake flavor really well, especially where the cream cheese creme comes into play. But the crazy fat guy in my brain won't allow a better grade than that because of the small package. WHY DO THEY WANT US TO EAT LESS COOKIES?!?!
-Review by Rich!

As always, feel free to drop us a line and tell us how great we are! Or if you have any ideas for future reviews, we like that too! Some item you saw at the grocery store? Perhaps the new offering from your favorite fast food joint? Ask us if we'll give it a review! You can drop us an email at fatguyfoodblog@gmail.com ! Be sure to follow us on Twitter for mini-reviews from the road , or even Like our Facebook page so you'll know every time we post a new review and you won't miss the cool snack world news we drop on there all the time!

Sunday, February 15, 2015

Doritos: Jacked 3D Jalepeno Pepper Jack ...chips?

So, I'm not the chip guy in the group, we all know that's Mike. So when handed these from the Snack Research Dept, I rolled my eyes and was prepared to be underwhelmed.
We all know Doritoes JACKED are just thicker chips with more flavor dust, but 3D? I'm intrigued.

this isn't a chip, or is it?

BEHOLD, the worlds first 3D snack. No longer just a gimmick to get you to pay $3 more than a regular movie ticket and give you a splitting headache no, this true invention marks a bold new era in chip making. Inspired by ancient carvings of Gobekli Tepe, with a large surface area in which to hold more flavor dust, this revolutionary design allows for the same air cruch that you get with a traditional Dorito. Which, of course, Ancient Astronaut theorists believe, could never be dreamed up by the men and technology of our time. The answer is of course:

 If you're a person afraid of a little heat, fear not. The Jalepeno Pepper Jack flavoring delivers a sweet fresh pepper smooth taste that invades your whole mouth, and allows the classic Dorito flavor come rolling in after it. Once the "chip" is done with you, a slow heat aches inside, beckoning you to take a sip off your favorite flavor of soda pop.
This snack of unknown origins is dangerous friends. It's casual enough to make you keep coming back to the bag, the heat addicting enough, the mystery enthralling enough, it's EXTREMELY easy to polish off one of these bags in one sitting.

I give Doritos JACKED 3D Jalepeno Pepper Jack a
This not only pioneers a new genre of glorious new chip experiences, it also
provides a welcome break to the stale chip landscape, where for decades the only
innovation was flavor. 

Wednesday, January 28, 2015

Taco Bell's New Crunchwrap Sliders!

The resident FGFB Taco Bell reviewer (FGFBTBR) is back. 

As someone who never really ate a lot of Mexican food growing up, I have certainly gone to Taco Bell a lot recently, due to their huge breakfast menu and their sudden passion for Crunchwraps
Hey, when you find something that works, you stick with it. Good job for recognizing you have something special, Taco Bell.

Their next step with that special something was to create 3 new Crunchwraps, but this time they're "sliders," and they're a lot cheaper. 

I've only heard of "sliders" being used to describe mini burgers, but I guess you can now use that to describe any food that's a mini version of another food. I got all 3 and laid out a fancy presentation:

I had no idea which was which, so I started with... something.

First off, I'm 99% sure these are the same size tortillas they use for their bigger Crunchwraps, and they fold them the exact same way. They're just much thinner because they don't have a hash brown filling them up. While they usually have eggs to fill them up too, it was pretty funny to realize how much of a Crunchwrap's mass is from that hash brown. But you're getting a real deal on tortillas, since these were cheap and a regular Crunchwrap can get up to around 4 bucks.

I bit into the first one and found out that it was the Spicy Chicken one. This is just marinated chicken, Fritos chips, and a creamy chipotle sauce.

First off, I LOVE that there are Fritos in these. Bravo Taco Bell. Bravo.
This was a little blah though. The chicken was pretty dry, and I made the mistake of getting these when I wasn't able to eat them right away. I re-heated them in the microwave, not thinking about the Fritos. Chips without crisp are not very good. 
But I was able to ignore that and focus on everything else. If this had had more sauce, my rating would be much higher, since the sauce is absolutely fantastic and is really necessary to help the dry blahness of the chicken. If I get this again, I'll order extra. 

some delicious peeking out

As this was, I'll give it a C. It needed more sauce, and more importantly, it needed cheese. I'll pay more, it's ok. Just give me cheese.

Next up was apparently the Beefy Cheddar Crunchwrap Slider.

looks like rice, but nope- just cheeeese

Why this has cheese in it and the chicken one doesn't is beyond me, because the cheese in this made it. I've never been a fan of that standard taco-seasoned beef, and my initial displeasure led to me ignoring Mexican food for most of my life, not realizing that everything else other than taco seasoning is pretty damn good.
So, this unfortunately has a lot of seasoned beef. But it also has Fritos, cheddar cheese, AND warm nacho cheese, which really made a difference. 
It was creamy and gooey in all the right ways something like this should be. 

I even went back and got another one on a different day so I could taste it with the crunch of the Fritos. As expected, this made it way better and helped give some texture to something that would have otherwise been goo.

I'll give this a C as well, but only because I'm not a fan of the beef. If you are though, this is absolutely something you need to get. The nacho cheese and melted cheddar rule. Put that on the chicken, Taco Bell! WTF!

So the last one up was actually the one I was most excited to try- the BLT Crunchwrap Slider.

This is exciting for many reasons. 

1. I love BLTs
2. Where can you get a BLT (sort of) sandwich for a buck?
3. What Mexican place makes BLTs? (yes, I know calling Taco Bell Mexican food is sacrilegious to many, but I don't care)

This has exactly what you'd expect, except it also includes Fritos and an Avocado Ranch sauce (?!).

And it rules.

I mean, look, this is dollar menu food at Taco Bell. This is not going to replace a BLT sub from that awesome sandwich place in the next town, or even your own homemade BLT with huge strips of bacon. 
But for the price and location, this is an awesome little creation. It falls apart quite easily (there's no solid mass to keep it together), but if it does, just make a little roll up like I did. 

The tomatoes taste great, the lettuce is there, the bacon is suprisingly flavorful and awesome, and the chips add an awesome bonus flavor and crunch. And the avocado ranch sauce (which, gun to my head, I would tell you was just ranch) is delicious and adds an awesome flavor. Who knows, maybe the secret avocado is what ties this whole thing together.
I love this thing and will absolutely be getting them until Taco Bell decides to take them off the menu, which will probably be way too soon. Hopefully, at least this one lasts. A.

To recap: 

Spicy Chicken: Needs cheese and more sauce, but not bad. C.
Beefy Cheddar: Terrific if you love taco-seasoned meat, otherwise just ok. C
BLT: If you like BLTs, ranch and Fritos (why wouldn't you like all of those?), get this. A.

One HUGE complaint though- Don't lie to me, Taco Bell. You said these were a buck each in the commercials, and you said they were a buck each on the website. I've bought these at 2 different Taco Bells in 2 different states, and they are not a dollar. They are $1.29. So either stop lying, or force the Taco Bells in Woburn, MA and Somersworth, NH to give me a lot of food for free since they're overcharging me (I'd prefer that). Thanks.

-review by Mike

Have something you think we should review? Spot some new snack out in the wild and think we need to know about it? Just want to write in and tell us how much we rock? COOL. You can email us at fatguyfoodblog@gmail.com. Also, we are on twitter: @fatguyfoodblog. You can even LIKE our facebook page, we do some fun stuff over there sometimes!

Thursday, January 22, 2015

It's Freakin' Awesome Snack Mix!

What's up? How have you all been? Is 2015 treating you well so far? GREAT! Well the entire crew of the Fatguyfoodblog is happy to finally get this new year of reviews under way! What the hell have we been up to? VACATION, DUDE! THE HOLIDAYS! Yeah I know it's well past that, but come on, we are lazy fat guys. We extend that vacation as long as we can! But that's all over now. You see, our mailbox has been bursting at the seams with products that awesome companies send us to try! So we are kicking off the 2015 season with one of the most interesting of those items we found in our mailbox. Ladies & Gents, feast your eyes on...

You know what? It really is freakin' awesome. 
There are a million snack mixes out there. From Chex Mix, to Munchies, to Cheez-Its snack mix, Heck, they even make Captain Crunch snack mixes. So if you're going to get into the snack mix business, you need something that's going to set you apart from the rest. So not only does your actual mix have to dazzle taste buds, but you also have to have some sort of gimmick that's going to grab snackers and not let go. I'm happy to say that Freakin' Awesome Snack Mix has both of these things.

First off, the ingredients. Freakin' Awesome Snack Mix is a delightful array of things. It has peanuts, almonds, dried cranberries, what appears to be a Crispix-like cereal, and caramelized tortilla chips. Whatever they use to caramelize the tortilla chips is also on the rest of the stuff, so it does a great job tying it all together. You get a sweet burst from the cranberries, two distinct different crunches and textures from the peanuts and almonds, and the cereal holds onto a lot of the flavor around it. But I'm not going to lie to you. There's one part of this that outshines the rest and that's the caramelized tortilla chips. At first, THEY ARE WEIRD. You kind of don't know if you like them or not. It's a burst of sweet followed by a strange spicy/cheesy flavor. But then you finish that first chip and your brain pauses for a moment and then screams, "THAT WAS WEIRD. LETS TRY ANOTHER!" Then after this happening a few times you realize that not only do you like the chips, but you freakin' LOVE them. 

These puppies are the real star of the show.
So there you have it. You know we deem the mix to be great. But what else does this have going for it? Well it's got a solid gimmick that it not only jumps out at you, but they shamelessly use it at every chance they get. When you read the bag, you can find FREAKIN' and AWESOME easily 400 times in a quick glance. It's great. Even their website runs with the gimmick: http://www.itsfreakinawesome.com/ ! Excellent, unique snack mix and a solid gimmick! I would highly recommend you give this a try.

I give It's Freakin' Awesome Snack Mix an A! I ate the entire bag in a span of two days and don't feel bad about it in the least. It was delicious and I'm planning on ordering some asap, unless of course perhaps some more showed up at Fatguyfoodblog headquarters. You never know!
You can order yourself some of this mix here: http://www.itsfreakinawesome.com/ .

Review by Rich.

Don't forget, we love to read emails from our readers! Have something you think we should review? Spot some new snack out in the wild and think we need to know about it? Wondering how that new menu item at your local fast food joint is and want us to tell you? Just want to write in and tell us how much we rock? COOL. You can email us at fatguyfoodblog@gmail.com . Also if you'd like we are on twitter : @fatguyfoodblog . Heck, you can even LIKE our facebook page, we do some fun stuff over there sometimes!

Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Mrs. Fields Soft Baked Originals and Cookies for Soldiers

A little while ago, we were contacted by either someone from Mrs. Fields or a promotion company (I don't really care who it was- all that really mattered to me was that they were gonna send me cookies), about reviewing and getting the word out about Mrs. Fields' partnership with the USO and a sweet little promotion they're running. 

Normally, it's pretty easy to be all I DONT CURR BOUT NOBODY I JUS WANNA EAT MAH COOKIES, but they're sending a cookie to a solider for every tweet that mentions them, so I get cookies and soldiers out on the front line get cookies too? I'm in. 

They sent us a sweet little gift box:

All in all, this is all the awesome stuff I got. I bitchin army santa hat, a mini American flag, an adorable snowman plate, a sweet little santa glass, and... milk?

Not gonna lie- I was a bit terrified to try to drink milk that had been mailed to me, but according to the container, it's ok to drink. And it's organic... Not sure how that works. But, I had some and didn't die, so I guess you can mail milk!

I was a bit cautious about these cookies. I worked in a mall for 5 years, and was a regular customer at Mrs. Fields. I started with their cookie sandwiches until I realized that 1. They were pretty much impossible to eat without all the frosting shooting out everywhere, and 2. I wanted to die after eating them, since it's literally 2 of the richest, sweetest cookies ever made with an inch of frosting in between and on top. Later, I switched it up to the more manageable cookie cupcakes, then became that guy who orders everything custom, and started asking for white chocolate macadamia nut cookies with light blue frosting put on them (it has to be light blue, trust me). At work, for anyone's birthday or last day, we got the giant cookie cakes that are like a foot across. When I left, my cookie cake said "die" on it. Maybe I wasn't as popular as I thought. 

Long story short, I'm very well versed in Mrs Fields cookies, and I assumed there was no way they could recreate the ridiculous goodness of their fresh mall cookies in a prepackaged style. But I had to try them. For the troops.

The box I got came with 8 cookies, all individually wrapped. 

are you not supposed to eat all 8 in one sitting?

Opening them up, they looked and smelled like great cookies, but I could tell that they weren't true Mrs. Fields cookies.

smaller too

But, let me tell you, these were some fine ass cookies. They really tasted a bit different than standard Mrs Fields. I would say they landed somewhere between Mrs. Fields and those awesome Keebler Soft Batch cookies. They were soft, very buttery and had TONS of chocolate chips in them. Honestly, they were better than most soft chocolate cookies you can get at the store- definitely not better than a local place that makes their own cookies, but better than anything you can get at a supermarket. 

chip city

Since they sent me milk and this adorable little glass (sorry, I'm a dude- this BADASS TOUGH glass), I had to have another with milk.

which sort of worked once I cut off a thin strip of cookie...

maybe the glass was more for show...

Either way, the milk helped, as it always does. These were some great cookies. 

Unfortunately, these aren't really in stores, or at least none that are near me. Or maybe I just haven't seen them. Either way, if you are a reader from outside New England, buy some of these if you see them. Here's a list of who sells them: Booyah. There are also other flavors other than Milk Chocolate Chip too, including the glorious white chunk macadamia. I'll definitely be on the lookout for these, and you should be too. Sure, a mall Mrs. Fields cookie is better, but you have to go to a mall to get them. Ughk.

Since Christmas is supposed to be a time of giving and being a good person rather than reigning blows on some old man's head to steal a cheap blu ray out of his hand (for yourself of course), take 15 seconds out of your day to tweet about cookies. I don't think it even matters what you tweet. And as far as I know, you can @ them so your regular twitter followers don't have to see that you're tweeting about cookies (I know you have a reputation to uphold). Or, mention what you're doing so people think you're a good person. Just mention @cookiemoment. Each mention sends a delicious cookie to someone who would probably love a cookie way more than you. 

You want coupons too? Ok. Go here and they'll give you one. 

This promotion only goes until 12/31, so if you're reading this, tweet every day and get 8 cookies to 8 soldiers. Or 8 cookies to one really fat mean soldier who steals the other soldiers' cookies. 

Do it for the Christmas spirit. Do it for little Cindy Lou Who. Do it in the name of St. Nick. Do it for the troops. Do it for America.

Cookies: A-
Promotion and Christmas Spirit of Mrs. Fields: A++++

-review by Mike

Friday, December 12, 2014

Dunkin' Donuts Croissant Donut & Angus Steak & Egg breakfast sandwich!

America runs on Dunkin'. It's true. Television and radio tell you that if you live in New England, every five minutes! However, I usually don't head there unless I'm in a jam. Why? Well mostly because their coffees aren't my favorite. Call me a coffee snob if you'd like, it's okay. But you can't deny there's few places better to get an array of breakfast items at a cheap price. So when we got a few requests to review the new items at ol' Dunks, I stepped up to the plate. So here goes! Let's take a look at the Dunkin Donuts Croissant Donut & the Angus Steak & Egg Breakfast Sandwich! 


Single donut box?! You've got my attention, Dunks! 
First thing I noticed was this cool little box they put the donut in. I'm used to them slapping it in a paper bag and calling it a day. Well it looks like they are trying to step up their game and let you know that this thing is a big deal. You've got my attention, Dunks.

Hey now...

First thought? This is a pretty looking donut. But it just looks like a slightly bigger than usual glazed donut with a little darker outer layer and a nice criss-cross pattern that could be deliberate or it could be due to the cooling racks they put them on. WE MAY NEVER KNOW THE TRUTH.

But once you rip into it, it really shines. The outside is slightly crispy and then the middle is a strange hybrid of chewy and flaky. It kind of defies logic. If you didn't know what it was you were eating, you might ask, "wait...wait just a moment. Is this a donut or a croissant?" Seriously. They nailed it. There's an excellent sweetness, followed by a slight crispy crunch, and then a nice flaky, chewy inside. Was it as good as the donuts from the Stonehouse Bakery in Barrington, NH? Hell no. But was it easily the best donut I have ever had from a Dunkin Donuts? Quite possibly! Very interesting and they definitely hit their mark.

I would give this strange hybrid donut a solid B!

Next on the agenda...the Angus Steak & Egg Breakfast Sandwich!

Of course I got it on an Everything bagel. Why? IT HAS ALL THE FLAVORS. I will never regret not getting ______. Because instead I get them all. Now before I tackle this one, let's hearken back to a simpler time when Mcdonalds debuted their steak breakfast sandwich. I literally got it ONCE. Just one time. Because that one time I bit into it and so much grease filled my mouth that I could have dumped the Orange Hi-C out of my cup and filled it to the brim with grease. So gross. So that's been burned into my head and was all I could imagine here. But, I was wrong. This really wasn't bad!

The flavor was kind of fake, like you'd expect. Whenever fast food tries to do a steak flavor it just ends up tasting a bit like beef jerky. I also found that as I neared the halfway point in the sandwich the steak patty ended up losing integrity and starting to fall apart and even almost looked like shredded steak. But all in all I don't have much to say about it. I won't rush out and get another one anytime soon, but if I was hungry in the morning and someone tossed me one of these, I'd make it my breakfast.

I'm going to give the Dunkin' Donuts Angus Steak & Egg breakfast sandwich a solid C+.

Now? Here's a picture that is somehow absurdly creepy.

Don't stare too long. You'll be sorry. 
See what I'm saying? Man. Hopefully Ol' Donut eye doesn't haunt your dreams tonight folks.


Don't forget to drop us a line to tell us how much you love us. We love to get those and we always hit you back. But also if you have an idea for a product or restaurant you would like us to review. We'll give it some serious thought! You can email us at fatguyfoodblog@gmail.com . Also if you'd like to see a tweet from us once in a while you can follow us on twitter at @fatguyfoodblog . Then, if you're on that Facebook thing, give our page a like and always know when our new reviews go live! You can find us at www.facebook.com/fatguyfoodblog ! Happy Holidays!